


Fortress of Solitudes

by Emmessann



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Derek "Nursey" Nurse is Unchill, Gen, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 08:23:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20255119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmessann/pseuds/Emmessann
Summary: So that’s cool. He’ll go to the gym, get some homework done, stream the game on his laptop.Sit for two days in an empty Haus.Chill.





	Fortress of Solitudes

**Author's Note:**

> I took inspiration from "Broken" by unacaritafeliz, namely that Bully might partner with Dex while Nursey's healing, and Nursey might feel uncertain of his position after his injury.

Nursey stays on the bench while the team huddles around Coach Hall. He’s attended every practice since he broke his arm, but it isn’t like he’s really a part of things. This talk, the last before they play Cornell, isn’t meant for him, and his mind drifts as Coach gives his final instructions to the players.

He looks up when Ford taps him with a stack of colored papers. “What’s this?”

She rolls her eyes toward the group, and Nursey realizes that everyone is looking at him. “Yes, Coach?” he asks.

“I said Denice has prepared a schedule of rehab work for you during the roadie, Nurse.”

Nursey glances at the top sheet. It seems pretty detailed. “Cool. So, this is stuff I can do on the bus?” Up to now the games have been at home, and Nursey has suited up for each one.

Chowder’s giving him a look that’s half panic, half pity. But Coach’s face only shifts from irate to kind.

“No, Nurse. As I was saying, the trainers recommend that you stay home for the next few roadies and concentrate on your rehab. We need you back up to scratch as fast as we can get you there, and sixteen hours on a bus won’t do you much good.”

“Oh, okay. Chill.” Nursey sneaks a glance at how Dex is taking this news. His shoulders seem tight but he’s looking away.

“Bulls is doing a great job stepping up to the plate for us, but we want our top D-men back in the saddle ASAP,” Coach goes on. “You keep up with the rehab at home and review the game tape with Coach Murray once we’re back.” He moves on to the wingers.

Face hot, Derek busies himself with Foxtrot’s schedule. It’s not just for the Cornell game; she’s made a whole calendar all through his recovery. ‘PIE AND RELAXATION’ days have little gold stars, and ‘CAST OFF’ gleams with some sort of rainbow glaze. He quirks an eyebrow. “Nail polish,” she whispers.

So that’s cool. He’ll go to the gym, get some homework done, stream the game on his laptop.

Sit for two days in an empty Haus.

Chill.

The team heads for the locker room. Nursey trails after them to change back into street clothes. He tries to catch Dex’s eye but he’s heading into the showers, talking to Bully.

“This roadie will be so weird, Nursey!” Chowder says. “It won’t feel right without you.”

“Ah, you guys will do great,” he says easily. “Maybe Dex’ll find his chill for once.”

“You two are having such a rough time. I just want you to come back together again.”

Ever since Dex moved into his so-called bungalow Nursey has felt untethered. No matter how much they’ve fought in the past, he’s always known they were still linked on the ice. But for now that connection is broken, and it doesn’t feel like there’s enough of a bond to sustain them without it. With so much tension it should be a relief to have Dex out of their room, but it isn’t. He’d pushed Dex pretty hard after his fall, sure, but he’d never meant to drive the guy to carpentry.

Dex comes out to get dressed, his hair still damp. “Better get ready if we’re going to Annie’s,” he tells Chowder.

“Oh yeah,” Chowder says. “You should come too, Nursey!”

Dex shows no reaction, so he grins. “Sure, just a sec…“ He makes a show of checking Foxtrot’s schedule. “Looks like I can squeeze you in for fifteen minutes, then I gotta head to water aerobics.”

“You need to take that shit seriously,” Dex says. “Don’t slack off just because you’re benched. Bully’s good, but we’d have a better chance with you back on the line.”

Nursey warms a little. Maybe Dex misses him after all?

“I’m glad we can all hang out before the roadie,” Chowder says. “It can’t be much fun all alone in the Haus. Maybe you could call some friends to come over?”

“Nah,” Nursey says, trying for bravado he doesn’t quite feel. “I’ll be fine. It’ll be chill, having the whole place to myself.”

“Just like you wanted,’ Dex says.

His tone’s matter-of-fact, but Nursey’s still stung. “Me? I’m not the one who needs two Fortress-of-Solitudes. You’re the one living the dream.”

“Sometimes one isn’t enough,” Dex says. “Sorry Chowder, I just remembered I have to go to Founder’s. I’ll see you guys later.” He turns and stalks off.

Nursey turns back to Chowder. “You could stand to live with me, couldn’t you?”

“Of course, Nursey!” Chowder says, then pinkens. “I mean, I’d rather not because, you know, me and Cait, but I’m sure we’d have a blast.” He hesitates. “I just think maybe sometimes Dex needs more space than we do, you know?

“Yeah maybe,” Nursey concedes. He waves his cast. “I guess lately I’ve just had more space than I know what to do with.”

“Tell me all about it at Annie’s,” Chowder says, and Nursey smiles.

~*~*~*~

Bitty left behind a full spread for Nursey “because man cannot live on pizza alone.” He starts up the game livestream while he gathers meatloaf, roasted veggies, and a slice of chocolate chess pie. The Haus echoes around him but the kitchen is cozy, suffused with Bitty’s warmth.

Wicks takes a hard check early on so Dex and Bully wind up playing a lot. Nursey scrutinizes every moment they’re on the ice, looking for signs of…what? That Bully’s better than him? Nursey groans as he whiffs an obvious chance to pass. The Waffle’s still a little rough around the edges.

Still, Bully has a certain quality Nursey can’t quite put his finger on. It’s almost like there’s a forcefield around the guy, deflecting the chaos of the game. Does Dex seem less uptight? Are they more connected as partners?

Nursey lets out an exuberant whoop when Dex scores the gamewinner off of Bully’s assist. He’s thrilled for them, truly.

Punching down the well of anxiety rising in him like bread dough, he cleans up dinner while he waits to call Chowder. It’s almost meditative, visualizing every detail of a routine he knows so well. _I bet Chowder just pounce-hugged Louis for scoring his first point. Bitty just said something captainy and Whiskey rolled his eyes. Now they’re all out except Foxtrot’s hollering to Tango that if he’s not dressed in three they’ll –_

RING!

Nursey jumps and chips the plate he was rinsing. He lunges for the phone, drying his hand on the leg of his jeans.

“Nursey! I’m so glad we caught you!” Chowder’s loud over the familiar sounds of the bus.

“Hey man, good game. I was gonna call you but I figured you’d still be back at the rink.”

“Hops patrolled Tango so he’d hurry up – Foxtrot’s orders! Wanna say hi to Dex? He’s right here!” Nursey waits through the fumbling.

“Hey, Dex. Great job tonight.”

“Thanks, Nurse. Did you go to the gym today? What’d you have for supper?”

“Aw gee, Grandpa Jack, glad you care. But seriously, man, you were on fire tonight. You and Bully were great out there.”

“Yeah, he’s a pretty solid partner. Kinda hard to get used to, though.”

“Oh really?” He’s not eager for dirt; that would be un-chill. “I could see he’s got kind of a different style on the ice.”

“Yeah, dude gets out there and you can’t tell if he just made a clutch shot or totally blew it. It’s like everything just washes right off him. Tough to read, you know? I’ve never played with someone like that before.” Nursey’s heart sinks as comprehension strikes.

_Holy shit. Bully even has more chill than me._

“Uh, yeah, that does sound weird,” Nursey agrees. “Lucky thing we never had that problem, huh.”

“For sure, Nurse. I can read you like a book.”

“Yeah, we totally need you back, Nursey!” Chowder chimes in. They chat until the bus reaches the hotel.

When he was little, Nursey would get scolded for leaving the lights on in a path from the downstairs up to his bedroom. His mom never understood that he needed a tunnel of light through the darkness of the brownstone, one he could follow all the way back to the outside world.

Tonight when Nursey goes to bed he leaves a tunnel of light all through the Haus.

~*~*~*~

It’s late afternoon before the team gets back. Despite the long ride home everyone’s up for a victory kegster. Nursey’s happy to join in, elated by the crush of bodies around him, warming the air to a kinder climate.

Until Dex gets on his case. “Nurse,” he says, eyeing his solo cup. “You’re not drinking tonight, are you?”

“Chyeah,” Nursey says. “But don’t worry. No patrol needed.”

Dex’s eyes narrow. “You shouldn’t be drinking while you’re healing, period.”

Nursey hesitates. There might have been something about that in Ford’s instructions. But this party is the first time in weeks he’s felt like a part of things.

He toasts Dex with his tub juice and takes a long swallow. Grinning at Dex’s glower, he says “I’ll stay off the table, how ‘bout that?”

The party is dece, but he can’t quite find his groove. Louis has the sound system under control; apparently music to shit your pants by is no longer his brand. Nursey dances until he whacks a volleyball girl with his cast and Farmer banishes him from the floor.

He’s ladling out another cup when Ford materializes at his side. “Nursey,” she says hesitantly, “I don’t think you should –“ But when he turns to her he catches sight of Dex at the far side of the room, scowling at him like a hall monitor.

Suddenly he’s so, so tired. “Whatever,” he says, dumping the drink. “Think I’ll call it a night.”

At the top of the landing he turns back to the crowd. “Hey! New bylaw,” he announces. “You’re not allowed to patrol me if you can’t stand to be in the same fucking room with me. Write that down,” he orders, and sweeps grandly up the stairs.

Rather, he would have swept grandly if he hadn’t forgotten about the caution tape. “M’okay, s’chill,” he mumbles to the strong arms that steady him and guide him up to his door.

Nursey fumbles for his keys and curses when he drops them. By the time he’s found them his door is open. “Good trick,” he says, and staggers to the ladder up to his bed. He’s not sure he’ll make it, then looks down at a creak to see that the little door to the Fortress of Solitude is open. “Can’t go in there, that’s Dex’s place,” he whispers.

There’s an irritated sigh. “Just get in the bed, Nurse, and sleep it off.” A gentle shove sends him half-collapsed into the cabinet.

With much effort he wriggles into the dark, close space. “Kinda like a coffin in here.”

“It’s ventilated.” A pause. “You want to get out?”

“Nah. Comfy coffin.” Something large bounces on his knees, and he reaches for it. “Thanks.” He puts his pillow under his head and hears the door close. Despite the kegster raging downstairs, the fortress is a cocoon of quiet. Feeling like the last man on earth, Nursey curls up and goes to sleep.

~*~*~*~

When Nursey wakes up the next morning, the fortress is suffused with a hazy glow. Light filters through the little window, limning the edges of the fake houseplants. He’s not sure why they’d been left behind. Grimly, he pictures Dex fleeing the room taking only what he could carry.

Someone knocks on his bedroom door. “Nurse, you alive in there?” He sits up so fast he bumps his head.

When the inner door opens, Nursey can’t suppress his yelp of alarm. Dex just rolls his eyes and leans in. “Dude, get a grip. I figured you’d need these.” He passes over a bottle of water and some Advil. “Plus a little light reading about I fucking told you so.” He waves a printout announcing EXCESS DRINKING IMPAIRS BONE HEALING. “So maybe you can wise up and stick to your rehab.”

Nursey accepts it cautiously. “You don’t mind that I’m in your space?” he asks.

“I mind that you’ve been risking your neck climbing the bunk every night. ‘Sides, it’s not my space anymore. I thought that was pretty clear.” Dex pulls back like he’s about to leave.

Nursey grabs his wrist. “Dude, nothing’s clear to me. Stay here and chat a spell.”

Dex sighs and climbs all the way in to sit cross-legged facing Nursey. “What do you want to chat about?”

“Well for one thing,” Derek takes a deep breath. “I want you to know that if Coach pairs you up with Bully permanently, I won’t make a fuss. If you want to make the trade early, you could tell him that.”

Dex looks confused, then horrified. “Why would I do that? You’re gonna be back before too long.”

Nursey sighs. “He might be better for you; got more chill than I do.” At Dex’s confused look, he explains.

“Huh -- wait. That’s chill? That’s what you’ve been trying for all this time? Oh Nurse. You poor deluded bastard.” Dex actually pats his knee. “I don’t need a partner with chill. The one I have is fine.”

The frustration rises in Nursey’s voice. “But if we’re fine, why’d you move out?”

Dex’s shoulders slump. “Well, for a while there it kinda seemed like you didn’t want me around.” He holds up a hand as Nursey begins to protest. “And I figured I’d been such a jerk over dibs I deserved it, and anyway Lardo really meant this room for you. Now it’s all yours.”

Nursey thinks about that. “So wait,” he says. “Moving out is, what, your apology for being a dick last spring? I never asked for that.”

Dex sighs. “I was mad – not so much at you, except for the undead pie that time. I had to move downstairs to realize that the main person I should be mad at was myself, for being a chickenshit.”

Nursey blinks. “When were you a chickenshit?”

Dex waves his arm as if to encompass the Haus. “I’ve wanted to live here since our Taddy tour, but I was too scared to actually ask anyone because I’m not the kind of guy who gets picked for things. I just kept fixing stuff and hoping someone would notice.”

“It could have worked, though. Hell, probably should have worked. I bet you’ve got more sweat equity in the Haus than anyone else, like, ever.” He thought a moment. “Huh. You did all that stuff for the Haus, and now it’s like the Haus made room for you.”

"That's stupidly poetic, but yeah, I guess."

Nursey takes a swig from the water bottle and looks around for some place to put it. There’s a low shelf that seems tailor-made for the job and he suddenly realizes that’s because it is. He tries to imagine what it’s like to see the world through Dex’s eyes, molding and shaping a perfect little hideaway out of a lower bunk that could barely dignify a blanket fort. “Chowder thinks you need more space than me.”

“He’s a pretty smart dude.”

“But that doesn’t mean you have to live in the basement,” Nursey says fretfully. “You’ve got your Fortress right here. Don’t you get lonely down there in the dark?”

Dex’s face softens. “Thanks, Nurse. It’s good to know you’d take me back. But I kinda like having my own place. I can be with the team as much as I want, and when the Haus gets too much for me I just go downstairs and shut the door.”

“It doesn’t make you feel like maybe you’re not part of the team at all?”

“No.” Nursey looks away from the compassion on Dex’s face. “Sometimes I need my time to recover, but I know the team’ll still be there for me once I’m back.”

“Wow, Dex, you actually sound chill about this. No wonder you work so well with Bully.”

Dex fishes around in his back pocket. “I just want to get my neurotic, intense, finally-admits-the-chill-is-a-lie partner back. Or why would I bring you this?” He flourishes another printout. This one says MARIJUANA USE MAY HELP FRACTURES HEAL.

Nursey’s grin splits his face. “No shit? Want to come help me get my rehab on?”

“Sure. Just not in the reading room. Pretty sure pot won’t cure a broken neck.”

~*~*~*~

A few days later, Nursey bounces into the kitchen where Bitty’s pouring pralines onto waxed paper while Dex mans the next batch on the stove. “Yo, cancel my meal plan for the next roadie,” he proclaims.

“Are you coming with us? That’s great, Nursey!” Bitty says. “I thought they still wanted you doing rehab here.”

“Coach Hall says they did, but then decided I’d do better as an active part of the team. Coach Murray’s gonna let me shadow him during the games.”

Dex stops stirring. “Sounds like they realized they can’t leave you alone for five minutes without you losing your mind.”

“Funny, Coach had a whole bunch of printouts about the psychology of injured athletes on his desk. Looked like he’d been reading up.”

Dex turns off the heat and pushes the pot over to Bitty. “Here you go. I’m gonna go study.” He raises an eyebrow at Nursey. “You coming?”

Grinning ear to ear, Nursey follows his partner downstairs.


End file.
